The Wisdom of Non-Judgment
I judge myself… a lot. Excessively. To an inordinate degree. Perhaps even with a degree of obsessiveness. Can I tell you, honestly, that all of that evaluation, comparison, self-regarding judgment and constant concern over myself and my current situation has had any particular value to me? No, it has not. Not at all. Yet still it occurs. Perhaps it’s a habit. Perhaps it’s a circular process, endless thought patterns forever folding back upon themselves, providing their own cyclical energy and feeding themselves in an relentless process of engagement and evaluation. But what have I gained from all of this? Little, I think - little indeed. Over-contemplation of any particular event, situation, person or pattern seems to have little value for those that engage in this form of behavior, for only through acceptance can peace be finally found where before there were only troubled thought patterns.
By all accounts and according to the perceptions of others, I have little to be concerned with and a tiny amount of actually legitimate concerns about myself. Yet still I engage in this process, forever wondering if I’m doing enough, if I’m living up to my fullest potential, or if I’m sliding off course again, perhaps reengaging with useless patterns and habituated processes that are not serving me well at all. It is possible that my desire for perfection serves to drive me ever forwards, constantly demanding more and consistently goading me to achieve more, to be more and become more than I am today. But it’s exhausting. It’s tiring to an nearly unlimited degree and I can’t tell you with any degree of honesty that I enjoy long periods of respite from these questions that constantly arise and dive back under the conscious level of my mind like whales breaching the surface and returning to the depths of the ocean.
You see, there is no value in self-evaluation, for it is rare indeed for any individual to have a perception of themselves that is at all accurate. It would seem, from the current state of the world, that a great many alive today believe themselves to be greater than they actually are, in truth. The ego and its mad perceptions appear to dominate this world, driving us ever forwards to gain more, accomplish more and acquire more material items, never satiated and forever hungry for more. But the ego is not who we are, in truth. We are so much more than the insanely unquenchable desires of the ego. Yet our current societies revere material wealth and excess to an extreme degree. Success is generally defined through wealth and material ownership - that guy has a Ferrari, so he must have really “made it.” But there is not an “it” to arrive at, no certain point at which the acquisition of riches will suffice and no final destination from which almost any person will feel that they have acquired all that they could ever need.
Certainly there are some amongst us who have gained so much wealth and material items that they may be willing to finally rest, content in their achievements and believing that they have accomplished all that they could possibly have set out to achieve. But these individuals are rare indeed, and sadly so, for they are the few that have accepted that while their egos will never be fulfilled, they themselves are satisfied with their positions and they no longer desire to continuously acquire ever greater amounts of money, power or fame. Yet this raises the question of whether they are willing to hold themselves in a non-judgmental state of awareness? Likely they are not, for instead of accepting that their worth remains exactly equal to the lowest members of society who have so much less than what they might actually need to lead even a slightly comfortable life, those with great acquisitions probably consider themselves to be deserving of such excess to one degree or another, for how else could they appropriately judge themselves to be truly deserving of so much when so many others survive with so much less?
Judgment of yourself or others has no value, for you have no basis on which to judge. You do not know and you do not have access to all of the information that would allow you to make a truly complete evaluation of all that has occurred in the life of another. You have, quite literally, not “walked in their shoes” in any manner whatsoever. As such, to attempt to judge another is a fruitless endeavour, one so fraught with the illusionary evaluations of the ego that no good can possibly come from trying to decide if any individual has actually achieved a state of being in which they might truly “deserve” that which they have. But in the same manner, turning judgment inwards has no value for you, for while you indeed have spent your entire life walking in your own shoes, even you are not properly positioned to pass judgment over yourself, for you do not remember all that has transpired. Much has been lost to time, memories obliterated by new experiences and remembrances subsumed under the weight of all that has come to pass after they transpired.
No one remembers all that has occurred, for there is little room in anyone’s mind to contain all of the details of every day that has been lived. As such, you have but the highlights and lowlights of your life from which to evaluate that which has occurred - the greatest triumphs and the most crushing defeats. All of the mundanities, the little details and the minute interactions that have transpired in such a myriad of manners have fallen behind you, now lost to the seas of time that contain all that has happened since you were first born into this world. As for myself, I can scarcely remember what I ate for lunch yesterday, let alone how I felt about any particular situation that took place many years ago. I have but a fragment of memory, an terrifically tiny amount of genuine recollections when compared to all that has passed through my life after all these years.
Because of this, I know with the deepest levels of my mind that I don’t have any basis on which to judge anything, for I am not possessed of sufficient knowledge to effectively render a truly complete judgment of anything at all. All I can hope to do is accurately evaluate any new situation against the sum total of all that I do remember, which is the scantest of traces of all that I might actually be able to employ in my evaluation if I were to have access to all of my memories. Because of the incomplete nature of my memory and my desire to judge myself as less than I am, constantly driving me forwards and attempting to be more than I was in the past and greater still in the future, my foundation of perception is skewed. It’s tilted, shifted towards inaccurate perceptions and endless self-evaluation that has no value for me whatsoever. Yet still I engage in this process, perhaps because I have become habituated to it, or perhaps I still believe that it fulfills some value in my life that it cannot possibly hold.
So I recommend a different path, even if I am not yet fully ready at this exact moment to engage myself in its transformational utility. I recommend nonjudgment in all things, for I have found no other way to glimpse the infinite peace that such a state of awareness can bring. Indeed I have enjoyed this rest from evaluation from time to time, becoming willing to dwell in the uncertainty of life and simply accepting all that has occurred without any need to make decisions about its value or lack thereof. I have found no other way to have infinitely expansive peace other than through the release of all that I have attempted to judge, for no other process in my life has provided even the merest fractions of the joy and simplicity that I have found when I truly attempt to release all that I’ve desired to judge, instead accepting all that occurs just as it transpires - including myself.
By all accounts and according to the perceptions of others, I have little to be concerned with and a tiny amount of actually legitimate concerns about myself. Yet still I engage in this process, forever wondering if I’m doing enough, if I’m living up to my fullest potential, or if I’m sliding off course again, perhaps reengaging with useless patterns and habituated processes that are not serving me well at all. It is possible that my desire for perfection serves to drive me ever forwards, constantly demanding more and consistently goading me to achieve more, to be more and become more than I am today. But it’s exhausting. It’s tiring to an nearly unlimited degree and I can’t tell you with any degree of honesty that I enjoy long periods of respite from these questions that constantly arise and dive back under the conscious level of my mind like whales breaching the surface and returning to the depths of the ocean.
You see, there is no value in self-evaluation, for it is rare indeed for any individual to have a perception of themselves that is at all accurate. It would seem, from the current state of the world, that a great many alive today believe themselves to be greater than they actually are, in truth. The ego and its mad perceptions appear to dominate this world, driving us ever forwards to gain more, accomplish more and acquire more material items, never satiated and forever hungry for more. But the ego is not who we are, in truth. We are so much more than the insanely unquenchable desires of the ego. Yet our current societies revere material wealth and excess to an extreme degree. Success is generally defined through wealth and material ownership - that guy has a Ferrari, so he must have really “made it.” But there is not an “it” to arrive at, no certain point at which the acquisition of riches will suffice and no final destination from which almost any person will feel that they have acquired all that they could ever need.
Certainly there are some amongst us who have gained so much wealth and material items that they may be willing to finally rest, content in their achievements and believing that they have accomplished all that they could possibly have set out to achieve. But these individuals are rare indeed, and sadly so, for they are the few that have accepted that while their egos will never be fulfilled, they themselves are satisfied with their positions and they no longer desire to continuously acquire ever greater amounts of money, power or fame. Yet this raises the question of whether they are willing to hold themselves in a non-judgmental state of awareness? Likely they are not, for instead of accepting that their worth remains exactly equal to the lowest members of society who have so much less than what they might actually need to lead even a slightly comfortable life, those with great acquisitions probably consider themselves to be deserving of such excess to one degree or another, for how else could they appropriately judge themselves to be truly deserving of so much when so many others survive with so much less?
Judgment of yourself or others has no value, for you have no basis on which to judge. You do not know and you do not have access to all of the information that would allow you to make a truly complete evaluation of all that has occurred in the life of another. You have, quite literally, not “walked in their shoes” in any manner whatsoever. As such, to attempt to judge another is a fruitless endeavour, one so fraught with the illusionary evaluations of the ego that no good can possibly come from trying to decide if any individual has actually achieved a state of being in which they might truly “deserve” that which they have. But in the same manner, turning judgment inwards has no value for you, for while you indeed have spent your entire life walking in your own shoes, even you are not properly positioned to pass judgment over yourself, for you do not remember all that has transpired. Much has been lost to time, memories obliterated by new experiences and remembrances subsumed under the weight of all that has come to pass after they transpired.
No one remembers all that has occurred, for there is little room in anyone’s mind to contain all of the details of every day that has been lived. As such, you have but the highlights and lowlights of your life from which to evaluate that which has occurred - the greatest triumphs and the most crushing defeats. All of the mundanities, the little details and the minute interactions that have transpired in such a myriad of manners have fallen behind you, now lost to the seas of time that contain all that has happened since you were first born into this world. As for myself, I can scarcely remember what I ate for lunch yesterday, let alone how I felt about any particular situation that took place many years ago. I have but a fragment of memory, an terrifically tiny amount of genuine recollections when compared to all that has passed through my life after all these years.
Because of this, I know with the deepest levels of my mind that I don’t have any basis on which to judge anything, for I am not possessed of sufficient knowledge to effectively render a truly complete judgment of anything at all. All I can hope to do is accurately evaluate any new situation against the sum total of all that I do remember, which is the scantest of traces of all that I might actually be able to employ in my evaluation if I were to have access to all of my memories. Because of the incomplete nature of my memory and my desire to judge myself as less than I am, constantly driving me forwards and attempting to be more than I was in the past and greater still in the future, my foundation of perception is skewed. It’s tilted, shifted towards inaccurate perceptions and endless self-evaluation that has no value for me whatsoever. Yet still I engage in this process, perhaps because I have become habituated to it, or perhaps I still believe that it fulfills some value in my life that it cannot possibly hold.
So I recommend a different path, even if I am not yet fully ready at this exact moment to engage myself in its transformational utility. I recommend nonjudgment in all things, for I have found no other way to glimpse the infinite peace that such a state of awareness can bring. Indeed I have enjoyed this rest from evaluation from time to time, becoming willing to dwell in the uncertainty of life and simply accepting all that has occurred without any need to make decisions about its value or lack thereof. I have found no other way to have infinitely expansive peace other than through the release of all that I have attempted to judge, for no other process in my life has provided even the merest fractions of the joy and simplicity that I have found when I truly attempt to release all that I’ve desired to judge, instead accepting all that occurs just as it transpires - including myself.